


If only

by Arenaarya



Category: League of Legends
Genre: Demacia (League of Legends), F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-21
Updated: 2021-01-23
Packaged: 2021-03-12 12:41:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28885548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arenaarya/pseuds/Arenaarya
Summary: How I imagine a visit in Sylas's cell would be like. This would happen before Syals escaped and before Lux's arranged engagement to the Prince.It is slightly less angsty.
Relationships: Luxanna "Lux" Crownguard/Sylas
Comments: 6
Kudos: 19





	1. If only you were here...

**Author's Note:**

> I had to write this out when the idea came to me. I will probably upload the second part of it once I'm happy with how it looks, most likely one of these days.

Lux was having a good day. Well, as good as it could ever get, considering she was a mage in a kingdom who despised her kind. Her work with the Illuminators went lovely, her mother was particularly cheerful at lunch and all of her assignments were done. Which meant that her light steps were free to take her to the mageseeker compound. And, fortunately, she could stay for as long as she wished, without worrying about being asked why her appointments were not honoured. Her smile grew wider the closer she got, a lively rhythm to her steps. The crossbody pouch hung low today, mischievously filled with delightful surprises she was eager to share. 

She almost pranced around the courtyard, convinced that she looked positively stupid in her sudden burst of happiness. After all, the people of the Palace preferred carton smiles to joyous laughter. She didn't even care that she was going to lose such a sunny day in the depths of a cell, after a week of studying and working behind heaps of books. The moment after the door to the compound closed behind her, her heart started beating faster. The excitement which the forbidden could bring her! Who could have thought that Luxanna Crownguard had a thing for danger. Or for prisoners. Handsome ones, at that.

She greeted the soldiers mechanically. The guards stood a little taller seeing her, then they opened the inner chambers for her. It smelled better inside. Lux had pestered her mom for weeks with a proposal she had written herself to better the conditions of the prisoners. She had read and read books about philosophy and anthropology, quoting them, boasting about how the greatness of a society is reflected in how it treats the helpless and the damned. She suggested that they need better food, better beds and better hygiene. Apparently, the proposal got to the heart of the young prince who, unlike his father, didn't damn all the mages. He said that rehabilitation should not be shameful and it shouldn't turn their hearts away from the light of Demacia. Lux smiled to herself, the prince certainly cared about a certain magical girl with special abilities and lavender-toned skin and he would see that harm would never come her way. But maybe his desire for change went deeper?

Lux frowned, thinking about her own responsibilities and of her own reason for wanting a better world. Perhaps the future of Demacia rested on the shoulders of the young, a pressing weight to right the wrongs of their forefathers. 

The cells still looked sad and so did the people in them. She averted her eyes. But Lux tried her best to pretend that it didn't make her heart sting with compassion, pain or shame. These were her kind. She snuffed out the thoughts. Not today. Today was special. She will be empathetic tomorrow. Not that her pity would help these poor souls. But, she told herself, her kindness could perhaps help one particularly gloomy soul, hiding behind impenetrable crystal eyes. 

Sylas was secluded. Several rows of cells stood empty before reaching the grand door which separated his room from the rest. Lux took a deep breath and went in, making sure to close the door behind her. Silence was broken only by the echo of her steps. She hung the torch into its usual spot, then balled light magic in her own palm when she got closer to the bars. 

"There you are!" she said when he came into view. He looked like he always looked. Bored. A quiet anger in his expression, perhaps it had been imprinted there by the years spent like this. He was sitting cross-legged by the bars, hunched over with a hand under his chin. Lux liked to think he was waiting for her, she smiled to herself. His eyes darted towards her, while denying her the pleasure of a more deserving greeting. 

"Why on earth do you sound surprised, Luxanna, where else would I be?" he asked with an annoyed tone, looking at her from under furrowed brows.

"Well hello to you too!" she chirped towards him before dropping down to the floor and mimicking his position. Only she got as close to the bars as she could, while he remained still. There were silent expectations from Sylas, he enjoyed making her go the extra mile while he waited to be entertained. And Lux had no problem with that, she liked his presence, his honesty, his banter and she would come to him regardless. Nonetheless, he remained unresponsive today. "Well aren't you in a great mood!" 

"You're very observant, Luxanna. I am glad you satisfy your curiosities about the effectiveness of bars and stone." he said, humouring the young woman.

Sylas straightened his back, stretching the muscles of his neck. His physique, full on display before Lux's eyes, left her staring awkwardly at his broad shoulders and chest, particularly focusing his toned arms. She wasn't used to seeing men so up close, especially half-naked ones, and seeing him never got old, no matter how many times she'd visit. A wide-eyed, confused, glance from Sylas made her snap out of it. She didn't notice his subtle smirk of pride.

Lux closed her mouth before she could drool, and cleared her throat. "I brought you some nice things today." she smiled as she looked inside the pouch. "There's some cupcakes, cold steak and bread, I even stole a tablecloth and some candles for when you're alone in the dark.". Lux gave him the packed food cautiously. 

Sylas clasped his palms over hers, accepting the gift far more wholeheartedly than her visit. Lux tried not to shy away at their contact, even if it made her heart skip a beat. Or two. As always, his touch lingered and a softer, relieved look, replaced the never ending frown. For some time now, he found all types of reasons for touching her palms, which stirred the heart of the young woman.

"If I didn't know better, little light, I'd think you're trying to wine and dine me." his words were meant to linger, soft-spoken in a ragged voice. His words were breadcrumbs, beckoning Lux to get closer and closer to him. Even behind bars, Sylas was a tempting snake with a knack for words.

Lux smiled nervously, pretending to have caught a nonexistent joke. She hid away her blushing cheeks by further digging among her treasures. 

"There's also some books. One's about the history of some foreing king and the other one is an adventure story." cheerfully, she handed them over to him, bracing for the electrifying touch which made her stutter. Their hands brushed and he looked, dreamily, into her eyes, as if he'd know something she didn't. He had such beautiful eyes, ever changing according to his emotions. 

"Thank you." he said firmly, the hint of a smile on his lips. What's that book you kept there?" he inquired, withdrawing his touch. It might be that he knew how much she liked it and he couldn't allow her more, teasing her. Or could it be that he wouldn't allow himself more?

"Oh, just a book. A friend gave it to me, she said it's a pretty little love story. So I said I'd give it a chance." 

"A love story?" he said, either questioning her taste or straight out mocking it. "I thought you said you are a busy lady. How do you squeeze in such fickle literature?"

"Oh, now you are being mean. Are you upset that I have not visited you in so long? I promise I've been productive." she teased him back, with a playful smile. Truth be told, she had probably missed him more than he did her. 

He raised an eyebrow towards her, returning to his usual coldness despite her overwhelming enthusiasm today. Although Lux was far from gloomy, Sylas wasn't exactly expecting her to be cheerful here. After all, their lessons were as much a necessary evil to him as to her. He could steal magic, and get cupcakes sometimes, and she'd learn how to not fry her brain with magic.

"You don't become a skilled mage by reading that, Luxanna. Besides, love was made to be lived, not read about." added Sylas, philosophical, like a teacher saying a very ordinary fact to a lacking student. He was often in the position of her teacher, one could almost say he liked that, being listened to. He liked to tell, she liked to ask, he'd command and she'd do.

"I wouldn't know much about love. I don't know how or why was it made." she retorted shyly, true to her prudish nature. She brushed a stray strand of hair from her eyes, avoiding to meet his gaze.

It was true. Lux knew little about her heart, let alone the hearts of men or boys. The daughters of Demacia, particularly the noble ones, were thought of as chaste, pure and patient. Fairytale maidens waiting for a dashing Prince to win them over with his bravery and devotion to the kingdom. Whatever excitement she felt when she was around Sylas was heavily guarded inside her, under a veil of silent ignorance where she would pretend that her feelings are of simple kinship. Anything else had to be out of question, despite indulging herself in these visits.

"Books won't teach you that either." he added, with a hint of melancholy to his voice. "It's not a vicarious experience. You have to feel it with a man or woman to know what it is."

"How will I know?" Lux asked, puzzled. Why would he speak to her of love? She doubted he could feel love, he could be at most a chameleon, mimicking others for his little gain. For his heart had surely been iced by the years spent here, tormented by loneliness and misery. Despite their tacit agreement to flirtation, Lux didn't hope much from Sylas' soul.

He smirked. "Trust me, you will". he decreed, final, refusing to give her a satisfying answer. 

"How was it for you? Did you happen to feel this or are you being oratorical?" she asked, doing her best not to sound too bold. Sylas was easy to shift at times and she didn't want to anger him now.

"I did." he suddenly went away, as if reaching into the depths of his mind for something distant, something he struggled to grasp. "It's not a nice story, Lux." he squinted at her. "Wouldn't you rather speak of something else?" 

Lux pursed her lips together, curious as she stared at him. His mask of indifference had cracks in it, eyes where she could read his sadness, a forlorn look brought back only by memories. Then he stared in her eyes, once again cold and composed. She shook her head. He sighed.

"I killed her. I handed her over to the Mageseekers when she confided in me, hoping I'd run away with her." he said, evenly, before looking away from Lux. "It happened right before I was imprisoned. I thought they'd cure her, or allow us to be together, but she cursed us all out. She fought."

Lux felt her breath stop short. It must have torn him apart then and now as well, though you had to know Sylas to realise that. Steeling himself was how he had survived all these years alone behind bars. The hints of emotional censorship, like the tension in his muscles or the rhythm of his breathing, betrayed the pain he felt even now, a dozen years later, for the mistake of a younger him.

"I..." she didn't quite know how to respond, feeling guilty for rattling such painful memories. Was she supposed to ask about her? Her stomach churned. "I'm sorry. You... you didn't know, you couldn't have imagined she'd die."

"No, Luxanna." he grimaced, annoyed with her apologies. "Even in my brainwashed state I should have known not to have fate in those who subdued me in the first place. I will pay my whole life for that glimmer of hope." his gaze was sad, a distant look as if she was a looking glass. "That is how I know it was love. The pain I felt back then, when she died fighting her captors, was excruciating." he gritted his teeth in anger, looking at her dead in the eye. "My mistake had been to ever imagine that Demacia could do anything for the good of the common people."

"I'm sorry for what you've suffered at their hands." she muttered, unaware how stupid it sounded. "I wish..."

"Your compassion might be inspiring in the upper circles. Sadly, it does little for my condition. Besides, suffering does not even begin to cover what they have done." his disappointment was evident. He did not like to be pitied, even more so by her.

She regretted her curiosity dearly. Lux was fiddling around with her fingers, as shame made her cheeks burn. Shame for her uncle, shame for the nobles, shame for whoever decided that mages were evil. She had inherited blood on her hands and her birthright was bathed in the blood of the innocents. She was the niece of the head of the Mageseekers, a Crownguard, a protector of kings, not of the people. Her, flourishing at the pinnacle of the hierarchy and Sylas, crushed by injustice, at the bottom of it, turning bitter with each passing day.

Catching her angst, Sylas shifted back into the present, his grimace turning into a coy grin. The emotional transition happened with such an ease that Lux should have been cautious of the man. But the Crownguard girl was too distraught to notice his swings. Who could ever know if they were controlled or spontaneous?

"Now now. We weren't meant to talk of things so upsetting, my little light. The past is dead and buried and I should have left it like that." he shrugged. "Besides, you couldn't have known that story was a sad one."

Lux took a deep breath, trying to channel her long-gone cheerfulness. 

"Well yes. But I could have refrained from prodding you about it." she said, thoughtful, as she traced her fingers on the cover of the love novel. "My mother says not to ask of stories you don't already know of."

Sylas looked at her puzzled. "Your world is awfully sterile. Do you only converse with others about platitudes? How do you get close, then?"

"We don't, or at least, I don't. The amount of people with whom I speak freely is small. To the rest, I'm simply polite. 

She had never thought badly of the court etiquette. It was her protection. The fewer people she had around, the smaller then danger of being found out. But even she had to admit, she was often lonely. That until Sylas came along and even his crass behaviour couldn't turn her away from sincere conversations. 

"Hmm, politeness is just another word for cold indifference. Don't ever do that here. I'd rather you respected me instead."

To you, I'd rather be kind. Respect was not what rose in her chest when she looked at him. An unspoken thought she wished to convey, but had little courage to do so. However, she just smiled at him. 

"What shall we do today? I have many free hours ahead. We could practice, we could read, we could talk..."

"What makes you think that I don't have anything else to do on my schedule, Luxanna?" he cut her short in a huff, crossing his arms over his broad chest.

Lux stopped, pondering what to say next. Nobody had ever told her that they wouldn't spend time with her, after all, she was one of the most well-known noble girls in the city. Boys and girls alike fought for her friendship and favour. 

"I could also leave...?"

He shook his head, lowering his chin. Then he grinned at her, a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. Could it be her was mocking her?

"That was a joke, little light. Why don't you read me some of that book you have there? I don't feel like getting political today." he gestured theatrically towards the other tomes, very well aware of his lie. 

Too late for not getting political today. 

Lux nodded, still iffy about his game of push and pull. He would never admit that he liked her company. Lux liked to read into this as the dissonance of him liking her, but disliking her status. She opened the book and intensified the light in her palm. 

She started reading, slowly, losing herself in the words of the author. The book talked about the misfortune of a young girl trapped in an ivory tower by a very powerful witch, who had kidnapped her for her son. She acted out loud the dialogues, trying to emulate how the characters would speak their humourous lines. Although Sylas wasn't laughing at her over-the-top attempts, he looked at her attentively. 

The son of the old crone would torment the maiden, taunting her with the idea of their joined fates. To which the girl would retort back with all kinds of insults, leaving the crone and her son in ridicule. 

"I couldn't ever try to be your sweetheart, for the only woman in your heart is to be your mother!" Lux decreed half-laughing, imitating the voice of a scorned maiden. Sylas snorted, then hid away his smile.

Chapters later, a dashing hero appeared in the story as a traveller looking for shelter. His steps had taken him to the manor of the witch. 

"Why do I feel like our heroine will swoon over this lad?" said Sylas scratching his beard.

"Shh, you'll spoil the story!" she pleaded playfully. 

Then Lux closed the book, making sure to remember the page. 

"We will continue next time. I won't read in your absence." she assured him with a wink. "But before I leave, I wanted to give you something else Sylas."

"What?" He was a little dazed, probably because they had ran through half a tome.

Lux took a small vial out of her pouch, making sure to check it carefully. Sylas watched her, unsure what to make of this.

"This is a potion I got from a traveller in the market. Well, not the ordinary market but the black market, though we will overlook that, won't we?

"Luxanna, explain."

"It's a magical bond potion." she said, giggly and excited. "It tethers two people. The one who drinks it and the one who puts something of their body in it. I've mixed my blood in it, just like the traveller said it works best. Then, the one who drinks it can see and hear through the eyes and ears of the other person. It should last a couple of hours, according to the seller. Though I don't know how it works on mages."

"I ... don't know what to say. Who on earth would need such a ridiculous potion in order to invent it?"

Lux almost smiled at his shocked answer. To be honest, she had been baffled as well in the beginning. 

"The traveller said that people buy it to catch unfaithful lovers or spouses, only they do it with a hair strand instead of blood." she clarified. Then she got a little closer to him, handing the vial over to a reluctant Sylas. "But for you, I thought that you haven't seen the outside in so long. I cannot bring that to you, but I maybe this might entertain you?" said Lux, unsure how to interpret his reaction.

"Luxanna, have you not learned how to spot a ruse? This can be nothing more than a sham, a trickster trying to scam naive people of coin."

"Well, it was worth a try at least. Don't be so dramatic! Wouldn't you at least try it? There is a hunt tomorrow morning, a celebration of sorts. Drink it when the guard changes in the compound. At worst, it doesn't work. But if it does, you'll get so see the sun, nature... " she sounded so hopeful, trying her best to bring comfort to an unfortunate soul. Of course, in her mind, she was more interested in pleasing him rather than being charitable, an endeavor which she enjoyed as of late much more than her ladylike duties.

"Fine. Tomorrow, the moment I hear the guards. How does it work anyway?

Lux shrugged. She had no idea. "Forgot to ask?" she admitted, ready to be chastised. 

Sylas just shook his head, resignated with her usual aloofness.

"How come you survive each day?" he sighed, utterly displeased by how careless she was to accept a magic potion, to try it, and not even ask how it was supposed to function.

"You will find out tomorrow!" she laughed, suddenly lighter. "I will leave you now. Goodnight!"

Then she got up and headed for the door. He was already out of sight, chains rattling as he moved. Not that he'd ever properly said goodbye to her. That night, she dreamed of the maiden and her dashing champion, flirting together under the nose of the old crone and her insufferable son.


	2. ... to hold me tight...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A turn of events and unspoken wishes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This deviates from the canon a little. But it made sense in my head.   
> Third and final part coming soon.

Cecily, her maid, came in with feather-like steps and opened the curtain to Lux's room. Light flowed inside, bathing everything in the color of the sunrise. The girl had fallen asleep in her bodysuit again, and lay sprawled on the bed in blissful dreams. 

"Miss Crownguard? Wake up, miss. It's time for the Royal Hunt. Miss?" 

Lux turned on her side and yawned, letting go of her covers. Her sleepy eyes regained their focus and she eyed her maid with surprise, quickly rising up.

"Cecily, what's wrong? 

The maid was holding a bunch of neatly folded garments, and waited patiently at the foot of her plush bed. 

"Nothing, miss. I'm here to help you prepare, as always."

"But the ball isn't until evening. I suppose I can prepare myself for a day out in the fields." she stretched out.

"Your aunt insisted. Please, miss Crownguard, I don't want any trouble. I'm supposed to make sure you look proper even for the hunt."

Lux shrugged. If Tianna had her way, the young woman would have tossed her blue uniform a long time ago. Suitors preferred dresses. And Lux should have cared for suitors, according to her aunt. After all, she was at the age of marriage, a little beyond that with her being twenty one already. Gods-forbid she was to see her twenty third birthday without a husband! The horror!

The young woman allowed her maid to bathe her, brush her, perfume her and dress her just as her aunt's wished. Truth be told, a little compliance here and there would go a long way, allowing her greater freedom later on. She had to be strategic when it came to her family if she wanted to keep the speck of independence she had. In a way, she was caged herself, though less literally than Sylas and with a lot more diversions. But her freedom was as fickle as the weather. 

Lux didn't like to think of marriage. Once her teenage years were behind and her eyes opened to see the reality of royal court, she realised that matchmaking was done with little regard for love. Sure, some made it happen even in their dire circumstances. Others learned to live without it, finding pleasure in their children or status. But a younger Lux had imagined that one day she would feel it, blinding, passionate and irrevocable love. Should her hand be given away on the basis of riches, nobility and breeding, her dream would remain just that, a dream. 

She looked at herself in the mirror while Cecily arranged her hair. Lux was a pretty girl, young and still hopeful. And that made her beautiful when she smiled, when she spoke of her passions. What would she become in an unwanted marriage, caged away under her husband's foot and whim? Surely, beauty could be snuffed out by unhappiness, faltering under the weight of forced matrimony. She would have to hide forever, living in fear under her husband's roof. A husband who may as well hand her over should he ever discover her magic.

"Smile, lady Crownguard." said Cecily kindly as she patted her on the shoulder. Although she had been at court for years, Lux still struggled to smile on command, maybe she just wasn't made for this pretend-play. "You are the most coveted young lady at court. All eyes will be on you." 

How dreadful. 

Lux nodded, thinking that she was concerned only with one particular pair of eyes. Eyes who could finally see her today. It was the hour of guard changing, he should be drinking the potion any minute now. And that thought finally brought up a smile on her lips.

***

Sylas lay down on his back, doing what he usually did when he wasn't sleeping. That is nothing. He could only be free in thought, that was the only part of him where the Mageseekers had never broken in.

His imagination had always been a forte. He had liked fantasy books and stories as a child, before becoming the property of Demacia. Of course, now his mind flew to fantasies of revenge, of killing the Demacian swine who had left him here to die and be tortured. Other times he imagined freeing the other mages and burning the city to the ground, with all the bootlickers who supported this regime. 

All in all, his fantasies were abundant with violence. Justified, of course. All in hopes of a better future? Maybe. For revenge? Definitely. Who knows what he wanted, some men would simply watch the world go up in flames while others would rebuild it. Besides, Sylas thought that you could fix Demacia only after cutting all the evil out, killing it. Only then could a better, equal, society be born and endure. Otherwise, people would return to what they knew. Servitude was easily ingrained in people, it stayed there long after the masters left. Leave one of the leaders alive, and the rabble will hurry to him, out of pure stupidity and habit. The habit of being ruled, told what to do and why.

Complete freedom was scary.

But in certain times his mind drifted to Lux. Of how she spent her days and how she struggled to control her magic around the other nobles. A small, terrified girl with a power beyond her understanding, scared even of her own shadow. He imagined her hunched over books, reading and learning under her tutors, bored out of her mind. Other times she imagined her caught, thrown into the dungeon, her body imprisoned but her mind free of propaganda after witnessing Demacian justice. He liked to believe that he had left his fingerprints all over her pretty little brain.

Did she ever think of him when she was not here?

He quickly dismissed the thought. The worst time was when she haunted his dreams. He didn't like to have her in his mind without controlling her presence. Things were unpredictable, to say the least. The man grimaced. One time he was killing her, righteously crushing her throat with his bare hands for crimes she was guilty of but didn't commit. Not so long ago he had had the most peculiar dream of her. A dream where he was fucking her right here in his cell. He shook his head, unsure which nightmare was worse. Supposedly, only one had left him rock hard and unsatisfied upon awakening. 

He hated her. He wanted her out of his mind and life.

But did he, really? Could he, really? 

The steps of the guards and their voices reminded him of what he had to do this morning. Silly girl with silly ideas. And him, indulging her, even sillier. 

He drank the content of the vial before he had time to change his mind. Even her fresh blood had a drop of magic, he could taste it. After gulping it, he sat still, waiting for whatever effect to kick in. His throat was burning, as if he had drank spirits. Suddenly, his vision went in and out of focus, and he struggled to keep his balance. Sylas felt the cold wall behind him and slowly fell down to the floor. He had a splitting headache, the type which made his ears ring.

After what felt like an eternity, he regained full control over his senses and all the pain went away. He sighed. He hadn't felt pain in a while, not since his jailers had grown bored of torturing him.

There was something strange in his mind, a presence of sorts. It felt like a tether he could pull at, guiding himself into a deep meditation. He focused on that thread, following it deeper and deeper into his thoughts, until he finally saw light and shapes and heard sounds. At first out of focus, the image became more and more clear as the potion worked its magic.

He could see Lux, staring in a mirror. He could hear the birds chirping, he could see the sun shining through the windows. Through her eyes and ears, he witnessed the events unfolding. 

Maybe she was not so silly after all.

***

Lux allowed Cecily to fit her coat over the white silky blouse. The red material was wrapped tightly around her ribcage, with gold buttons keeping it in place. It fanned out to cover the upper part of her thighs while the back was longer, like the tail of a sparrow. It looked imperial, making her seem older than she looked. At least they didn't send her hunting in chiffon. 

Suddenly, she felt an strange tether pull tight at her mind, like a pulsing headache which slowly faded away. He was here. For a lack of intimacy, she smiled at herself in the mirror in order to salute him. 

"There now, miss. A smile does wonders. I believe we are done." said Cecily as she finished braiding her hair. 

The girl turned to look at her maid, slightly dizzy. The magic took its toll.

"Thank you. Did my aunt instruct anything else?" 

"Just the usual, make the family proud, be on your best behaviour. Yada-yada." 

Lux smiled. Cecily bowed and scurried away. She had a moment to herself, at last. She sat down to her vanity table, feeling nervous and yet oddly excited. 

"So, you drank it after all? Glad you didn't get cold feet. I guess only I will be talking to you today. The bond is one-way." she said to herself, in the mirror. 

Oh, this was going to be an awkward day. Especially if someone was to see her talking to herself by accident. 

"I might be able to sneak out tonight, after the ball. Until then, I'm caught up with the lot of nobles." she sighed, absent minded, while playing around with the bristles of her brush.

Lux rose to shoot a final glance to the mirror and smiled to her reflection before going away. She made a point to rotate her gaze around the palace and its gardens, to catch in as much of the view as she could. People usually moved out of her way, bowing or nodding their heads in respect. That made her cheeks burn harder, in this special day. She wished she wouldn't have to remind Sylas of who she was or what she represented. She was sure he was probably grimacing, displeased. 

In outer courtyard of the castle, the youth of the nobility had gathered in a flurry of coats, riding boots and laughter. Some ladies even wore colourful dresses, to her surprise. But then again, some ladies had to impress more urgently than her. 

At the centre of the procession, was prince Jarvan, along with her brother and other noble sons of similar age. They were more lively than the girls, who were whispering among each other, giggling and pointing fingers. 

Wouldn't it start already!

She headed for her brother, refusing to stay alone in the middle of everyone. He saw her before she reached them. The prince didn't notice her, as he was fastening the belts of his saddle.

"Ah, gentlemen, my sister appears to be trying to spy on us. Good morning Luxanna." her brother greeted her, with a nod. The others greeted her a little more formally, bowing, or even kissing her hand.

"Oh please, gossip away. It's mandatory etiquette for such a celebration." she said, acting coy. Who said that she had to be socially handicapped despite her being a loner? "Besides, I might infiltrate the women's chatter later, bring you any news I can find."

The prince had finished with his adjustments and turned on his heel to face the group. Lux, as she was dressed like the men, bowed deeply, almost forgetting that Sylas was in a corner of her mind. "Your Highness."

"You are quite the infiltrator, aren't you, lady Crownguard?" said the prince, cold, almost mean. "What other tricks will you showcase for us today?" he said, mockingly. 

Ouch! Either she had offended him or he was in a spectacular mood.

Lux, as well as the rest, were taken by surprise. Puzzled as what to say next, she decided to heed her aunt's advice. "We will see, my Prince." Then she made her exit as quickly as she could. "Your Highness, my lords."

She scurried away, tense and confused. A stable boy had brought her the black stallion which had been gifted to her by her family. The beast towered over her, calm, and she quickly dismissed the servant in order to inspect her saddle and horse. 

So much for blending in and making the family proud. Everyone prepared for riding, and she followed. Soon, they were out of the city with the gates closing at their backs. While her brother was at the prince's side, in the front, she remained alone at the end of the herd, tailing behind other ladies of lesser rank.

But she freed her mind of the circumstances. Throughout the journey, her eyes darted left and right, admiring the beauty of the green scenery. The mountains stood tall to the left. Scattered groves with elder trees stretched miles and miles away. And an orchard bloomed white and tempting, surely belonging to some manor. It was surely heavenly to lay under the blooming trees there, not a care in the world. 

It was probably even more romantic to lay with somebody, she imagined, dreamy. 

It didn't take long before they entered a forest. The trees were far enough from one another to allow the sun rays to pass, for the grass was green and their backs were warm. Lux could see a glade up ahead. They stopped when they finally reached it. 

Everyone got off their horses and gathered around the prince. This seemed strange. Lux decided to leave her hunting gear on the horse and follow the rest, where the prince was addressing his party.

"As you all know, today's hunt is very special. We will not be hunting deer or boar, and not all of us will be hunters." he had his way with the crowd, she had always thought the prince was very charismatic, fitting for a ruler. Then why on earth did he speak to her like that? 

The people around her were chattering quietly. Surely she wasn't the only one who was surprised of this turn of events? Ladies and lords alike, they seemed eager to play this game.

"We will draw straws for the roles. Whoever receives a red-ended stick, will play the role of the hunt. Likewise, the blue-ended sticks mark out the hunters. There is an even number of each." said her brother, presenting the box with the sticks and their hidden ends. 

"The hunted get ten minutes to find a hiding place or to run away. Remember, you must not leave this grove, do not venture too far. It has been secured for us but we cannot know what lies out of bounds. Hunters, you have until sundown to find your prey. You may ask a favour of them, when you find them."

Lux sighed. This was a matchmaking game, supposed to allow the youth to find their sweetheart. A game which was of little interest to her, she had preferred a true hunt. But the others chattered happily and hurried to claim their role. Their laughter and voices faded into the background. 

What if Sylas would have been here? Would he have played such a silly game with her? Not everything had to be serious and grim all the time, not in her dreams. He probably would chase her, catch up to her, naturally as Lux would purposefully run slower. He might topple her over in the grass, making sure the prey was caught. He would immobilize her with his weight, just to make sure she couldn't escape. As if. And then he'd ask for her favour, or simply take it, knowing that her answer would forever be yes.

She only woke up from her fantasies when her brother passed her over the box with only two remaining straws. A blue-ended one. 

"It seems like I'm a hunter." she said flatly.

"Than that makes me the last of the hunted." said Jarvan as he took out a red-ended stick. 

Lux will have to channel her worst hunter skills ever and instead head in the opposite direction. She decided that she'll walk through the forest avoiding any possibility of finding some noble boy, eager to offer her his favour. 

The group of boys and girls to be hunted had scattered away, running for cover in a cloud of giggles, chiffon and hooves. Both her brother and the prince had left. Lux felt lonely and uncomfortable. 

"Lady Crownguard?" a girl approached her. Another group of girls was eyeing them expectantly. Lux nodded, turning towards Priscilla Weyland. "Lady Crownguard, do you happen to know if your brother already has a sweetheart at our court? Or if he likes any particular noble girls in the city?"

Lux smiled faintly, biting her lip.

"I do not know of such a woman, Priscilla." all the girls looked relieved. It technically was true. Katarina was not part of this court. She would play a little joke on them. "My brother has yet to find someone here at court. But what I do know, my ladies, is that he has a preference for redheads."

The group protested a little, some of them suddenly displeased with the colour of their hair. Others proudly caressed their ginger curls. And another tried to ask her friend if her light auburn mane could be reddish in the sunlight. 

Even Sylas had to have grinned at this. That is ir didn't infuriate him how fickle were the noble ladies. Lux surely did like to do so. As the grace period ended, the so called hunters readied their horses and went to claim their sweetheart. 

However, Lux led her stallion to a different part of the forest. She rode slowly, taking in the pristine scenery. She had always liked the forest, the fields and their quiet peace. It reminded her of childhood and of the countryside manor where she and Garen grew up. Life before court was so much easier. 

She sighed. Maybe in a different world she would have met Sylas under better circumstances, where they wouldn't be bound by Demacian laws or court rules, where he wouldn't have been forced to fight against his kin, where he wouldn't have been in the position to kill his comrades in foolish raids for mages. But it was all that, a useless and impossible dream.

"I hope you enjoy the nature. I never asked you before what kind of places you preferred when you were, you know, free. I would have liked to take you there today. That unless it made you sad." whispered Lux.

She continued to ramble as she paced slowly. Sometimes she would even walk, leading the horse by its bridle. 

After circling around the forest for hours on end, avoiding any noise and people, she found a stream. Lux got off her horse and stretched her limbs while Thunder lapped at the cold water. 

"Is it any good, boy?" she said sweetly while caressing it's mane. She opted to sit down on a boulder instead of green grass, allowing the horse a little rest. 

The stream was going down a small slope. It flowed evenly, calm in its narrow path. It reminded her of her life, heading only where it always was supposed to. Her mind was clouded by the thought of living like this for the rest of her life. Always prim and proper, always following rules made by others in a never-ending obedience. Always denying her true nature. Then her face lit up with resolve, realising that she couldn't. "We will be free one day. I shall make sure of that." she hummed thoughtfully. 

"Free of what?" said a voice out of nowhere, startling her. "Lady Crownguard, I don't think you remember that it was you who was supposed to be the hunter, not I. I've been tailing you for a while now." said the prince, coming out of the thicket behind her. He was snarky and gloomy, fostering the same resentment she received earlier. 

"Your Highness" she quickly rose and bowed. 

"No need for formalities." he dismissed her. "Besides, what do those even mean to you since you see yourself far above the wishes of a prince."

"Your Highness, I do not known what have I done to deserve your dismay. If I offended..." she said, puzzled before he cut her off.

"Don't try to fool me." he rose his palm in the air, frustrated with her. "You won't get what you want."

"Jarvan, I beg of you, speak clearly. I have no idea what I've done." said Lux, trying to assert herself in this outrageous situation. "There must be a confusion..."

"Oh, please. Why on earth would your family push for my engagement only to sweep you under my father's nose, if not for your demands? Why would they emphasize how dear I am to you and how you wish to make me happy?"

Lux fell back down on the boulder she was sitting before. She stared at him wide-eyed while her heart surely had skipped a beat. Lux tried to control her breathing before her cheeks turned flush red with surprise, anger and fear. Her hand fiddled with the buttons of her coat, freeing her neck. The young prince rose an eyebrow, surely thinking that she was only trying to stir his emotions. 

"What has my family done?" she asked him in disbelief. 

"What do you mean?" he asked, measuring her from head to toe.

"What are they pushing for?" she demanded, on a harsher tone than a prince was used to. "I mean, Your Highness." Not that it currently mattered how they spoke, there were bigger problems at hand.

"Isn't it obvious? They agreed that we will get married!" he growled at her, losing his temper. 

"I didn't know. When was this? Are there any concrete plans?"

"Please stop trying to hide your excitement under these theatricals..."

"I'm not hiding anything, Jarvan! I've known you since I was seven, even before you were the crowned prince. We've played like a brother and a sister with Garen. I do not wish to marry you, nor do I want to be queen." she exhaled, upset and desperate. Why was her family always aiming for the stars? They had Crownguards everywhere, wrapped around the kingdom's power like an octopus. Why did they need one on the throne as well?

"Well then why are they sending Shyvana away? Why is my father encouraging me to court you?" 

"I. Don't. Know. I've always believed that... wait, they sent Shyvana away?" she put her head down in her palms, shaking her head. What a mess! To banish her would make Jarvan an enemy to her family. What did her family do? The prince seemed to have cooled off as well, at least he didn't think of her as an unscrupulous opportunist. 

"Yesterday, yes. She has been told to leave."

She rose to face him, quickly and determined. She had been very happy for the two of them, content that at least a dear friend will have love and happiness in his life. 

"Well, I'll tell my family I won't do it. And so will you." she decided, categorically and unilaterally. She saw him ready to protest her simplistic take. "No, we will tell them that it is non-negotiable."

"Done." he said, after considering her words. "I was supposed to propose here, at the hunt. And make it official tonight at the ball."

"We will talk with them before that, then. It is almost afternoon. Cut the picnic short and let us head back to the city." she demanded.

He nodded, probably feeling content that Lux, someone he had held in high regard, had stayed true to her nature. 

Lux thought about Sylas. Sadly, he had to wait. She didn't even want to imagine what he thought after witnessing this mess.

To be continued.


End file.
